The Whim and Whimsy of my Artistic Inspiration - It Moves Like the Wind

I’ve been asked by various people to create this piece of pop-art or that flower … and I really wish I could but it’s harder for me. It’s odd, I have to create in the way that my artistic inspiration moves. This past week, for example, I have been inspired to create birds - bird after bird. Not Fractals or modern abstractions … just birds. When I move out of the inspirational path, art becomes forced and it just isn’t good to force my hand. That kind of art that is forced “feels” totally different and not very fulfilling. It’s work. It isn’t created with ease or enlightenment … and it never seems to materialize into anything. I have to move with inspiration, there is no other way for me.

The gallery below - my new Bird series - is an example of moving with inspiration. I started picturing birds in my minds eye. Certain types of birds, certain colors and perching in certain directions - the images were vivid. With vivid images in my brain (that’s how they come) I went off to create birds. Most in the gallery below are the result of inspiration over this past week. I’ve worked tirelessly to get the inspiration out of my head and onto a digital canvas. Inspiration needs to spill out, there is no other outlet. My birds are the result of that very thing. The Bald Eagle, Lorikeets and Owl are older pieces. All the rest are brand new and I’m very excited about them. It seems that my art is moving more in groups / series now. I like that. Things are becoming a bit more consistent.

I think I probably have a few more birds in me - it’s hard to tell. :)

Brain Injury and Insomnia - "Abandoning Morpheus"

What’s a girl to do when sleep is gone? Create art.

It was 0330 and I was wide awake. Not just a little awake, but eyes open wide and brain raring to go. But where did it want to go? I’ve discovered that when there is no good constructive place to go, I can peacefully go to the place where I create. There is safety and solace there. A way to bathe a wandering mind in color and beauty. There are no thoughts worthy of wakefulness at this hour - the world is sleeping where I live. Thoughts can get scary and intrusive at this time with creation’s hush. All is still …

One of the biggest challenges of having an injury to the brain - whether through an accident or disease process - is that things that should work normally like sleep patterns / circadian rhythms and body temperature regulation just don’t. It kind of works like this: often, when you are hot, I’m cold … when you are sleeping, I’m awake or a million times vice versa. Oftentimes I will also smell things that are not there and chase a smell to no resolve. Sometimes it makes me feel a little insane. The constantly ringing ears are a plus too (I wear double hearing aids to drown some of that out because I have quite a bit of hearing loss). My brain makes up it’s own agenda. Things can flip flop in the blink of an eye. Sensory overload. It feels like I’ve become a lot more sensitive to these things over the past year or two. One day at a time, but it can be a lot to juggle. My recourse: look forward as best I can and stay occupied. No pity pots here.

Yesterday I felt a lot of fatigue. I went out and ran a few errands and it felt like I had run a marathon. None of it makes sense. But it’s the way life rolls now. I’m glad I have art to help fight intrusions and to distract me from my wandering mind. God’s gift to me in so many ways.

Below is a piece I’ve been working on but was able to finish this morning at about 0400. It’s one of those pieces where art imitates life for me. This is “Abandoning Morpheus” (Morpheus being the god of dreams). When I was in the convent, after night prayer one of the older nuns would pray that we would sleep well in the “arms of Morpheus”. This piece depicts the colors of night being sheared by colors of the day - a premature entry into that place of sleep and dreams.

“Abandoning Morpheus” an abstract I finished up during the wee hours of the morning.

“Abandoning Morpheus” an abstract I finished up during the wee hours of the morning.

"Unafraid" my reflections and inspiration.

Sometimes an inspiration comes so swiftly and dramatically to me that I have to bring it to life and do it with urgency - this one woke me up this morning after I had been working on it for several days. The title spoke to me and came instantaneously as inspiration much in the same way the symbolism did. So what does this piece say to me? Here is what I feel.

Central to “Unafraid” is the sublimated image of a lion’s head - the male with his large mane and staring straight into my soul. The Lion of Judah. The lion is not completely obvious, but He can make His presence known if you spend time looking at the work. The lion for me is symbolic of strength and courage, of protection and guardianship - of my spirituality and my daily walk. The Lion of Judah sits amidst abstract floral structures that carry themselves across layers on the canvas (moving from right to left and forward to back). They are symbolic of a planting and “blooming” … and in their depths are found the strength of the lion sitting with patience and keeping watch. Being planted and blooming amidst obstacles and walls and challenges and chaos. This is my meditation and the spirit in which “unafraid” was created.

In all of the stages of my life, the planting and blooming amidst the most chaotic and challenging of circumstances … the lion and all He symbolizes sits there quietly, keeping watch and lending all the courage and assurance I need. He assures me that I am not alone and that my courage, much like my art, has origins outside of me.

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Perception - I see things a little differently!

I learned something when I examined this picture today and I think it might shed a little light on the way my brain processes and could be a look into why I developed artistic ability through brain injury - maybe this gives an inkling.

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“Art” - the Amazing ‘Benefactor’

Art has given me hope, new meaning in life, and an almost bottomless wonder and fascination with a never ending curiosity. There are enough of all of these things to take me throughout my lifetime and help me move forward in a happier and more engaged way.

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